10. Grocery shopping seems to take twice a long when we have to trek to the other side of the store to find a bathroom, twice, and I forget which aisle we left off at, twice.
9. Two words shouted from the back seat, "Mama, pee!" sends our car careening across two lanes of traffic to catch the nearest exit off the highway, jumping out on the side of the road, freeing a panicked child from the carseat, shoving on her shoes (why is she wearing high-tops?!), and holding her over the muddy grass praying that she aims away from my feet.
8. Apparently the only thing that was ever holding up her pants was that big diaper bum. They don't seem to make pants in a size 2-diaperless.
7. Public restrooms. That's all I have to say on that one.
6. Peaceful nights of sleeping through the wet diapers turn into shouts of, "mama, pee!" and a toddler who thinks that because she is now out of her crib and on the toilet, it must be morning. At 10:00 pm.
5. How can the sudden urge to use the bathroom be timed so well with sitting down to the beginning of a delicious hot dinner?
4. Crying wolf. The phrase, "uh-oh, pee" is now being used to get out of certain situations. Where once we would jump at those words, now we have to discern whether it really is a full bladder or just nap procrastination.
3. The words "pee" "poo" "toilet" and "bathroom" now make up 90% of my daily vocabulary.
2. The toddler's urge to be an independent wiper coupled with frequently overestimating the number of squares needed, has caused our weekly toilet paper consumption to triple.
1. Most playgrounds don't come equipped with bathrooms. And no, I don't consider a port-a-potty a bathroom.
Lol! thank you that made me laugh and reminded me of days passed.
ReplyDeletelove
C
Really funny. But funnier to Grama than to Mom I suspect.
ReplyDelete